It is a mystery how this hardly-an-a-cup-flattie can muster up the courage to go out in a bikini to work on its tan. There must be countless people who whisper about her behind her back. Every time she hears somebody laugh, chances are high that they are laughing at her; every time somebody glances at her, it’s most likely a glance of disgust.

Only after a boob job will she be able to wear a bikini without having to second guess every comment or glance, and without the terrible feeling of inadequacy and insecurity growing stronger every second.

The next time you see a flattie in a bikini, make sure you let them feel their inadequacy. Laugh at them, look at them with a mixture of pity and disgust, or, if you’re a woman with actual tits, squeeze them and make sure she becomes painfully aware of what she’s lacking.